There's no escape
I can't wait
I need a hit
Baby, gimme it
You're dangerous
I'm lovin' it
She's a schoolgirl. But make no mistake - she's not that innocent.
She knows she's Lucky. But somehow, she just can't get no satisfaction.
She's a slave 4 U. But don't think that means she wants to be so damned overprotected, OK?
She's crazy.
She's toxic (and she might be slippin' under).
...And now, she's bald. Cool.
I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
all you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
so won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
and put one of those fingers on each hand up
and be proud to be outta your mind
and outta control
Qu'est-ce qui se passe?
¿Qué passo?
WTF, mate?
. . .
You thought she'd never do something as CRAZY as that, didn't you? ...Did you think she'd be too scared? Too vain to lose those long, sultry locks? Well, I guess you're just gonna have to think again, bee-atch! Know why? 'Cause Britney feels pain too. Yeah, that s'right. She's been through it - lived on the fringe. (Don't think she hasn't.) She's got layers. She's got angst. She's effing hard as nails. Don't mess.
Guess this'll be the last time the media plays "Chicken" with her, eh?
As far as I'm concerned, she's proven herself.
Yep, Alterna-Spears has said it loud and clear:
"I'm still a Slave 2 all the celebrity trends, and I'm so through with being ignored!"
You'd better believe that motherhood hasn't skewed her perspective. She still knows what's "in" - she still knows how today's Hollywood elite stay ahead. She knows that fail safe way to get a leg-up back into the spotlight. You know how those celebs do it, don't you?
They go to Rehab. ...Well, first they have one (or several) public meltdowns - this is key. Then once they've gotten our attention (which admittedly takes a lot these days) and shown us all just how upset they are; how tired they are of their privacy being so ruthlessly invaded - THEN, they go to Rehab.
In all fairness, Lindsay and Nicole, like, just got out of rehab, right? It was totally Britney's turn to go (again). And Britney Spears is basically Nicole Ritchie. I mean, their lives are so similar, ...right? ...Right?? ...
Besides, it's cool to be all punk rock, it's cool to be angry, it's cool to be "messed up" - it's cool to be dark and jaded. ...Right??
Too high
Can't come down
Losin' my head
Spinnin' 'round and 'round...
With the taste of the poison paradise
I'm addicted to you
Don't you know that you're toxic?
Intoxicate me now...
Here's what's not cool:
- Glamorizing the "heroin-chic" image - drug abuse, addiction, depression, DUI's, self-destruction, etc.
- Using self-destructive or disturbing behavior to get the attention of the popular media - to "up" one's exposure; to "reinvent" one's self.
Maybe I'm not being altogether fair. Maybe Britney really is suffering, which is truly sad. Addiction and depression are real, serious illnesses. I am not trivializing that.
But here's the part I'm stuck on: If she's suffering from illness, why did she need to shave her head in public? It's not like that's a subtle move. (Nor is flashing the paparazzi whenever you go out for drinks with Paris Hilton, I might add.) It's definitely not constructive or mature behavior. As far as I know, she's not raising money for cancer research.
OK, *maybe* Britney shaving her own head is equivalent in her mind to a cry for help. It just seems more like an adolescent prank - a way to say, "I'm angry!" - an effective ploy to get "Mom and Dad" to pay more attention. Negative attention is better than no attention at all. (There's no such thing as bad press.)
I think she threw a tantrum. She got controversial. (Her image was suffering a bit.) And she most definitely got some major attention for it - and it's not as though she's oblivious to her celebrity status.
If she really wants people to just "leave her alone" so that she can get her life back together, why didn't she just go privately and quietly into rehab with the support of her cadre of personal assistants, managers, groupies and the like. If she wanted a break from the paparazzi, why didn't she lay low for a while? Why didn't she emote in the privacy of her home? Why didn't she attempt to stay in rehab the first time??
Those who are clinically ill tend to suffer in relative silence. Drug addicts don't commonly attach scarlet letter A's to their chests and walk around pouting.
Yes, I think it's dumb that such a big deal has been made of Britney's x-treme haircut. Yes, the media hype is ridiculous. But it's not as though such things haven't been ravished by those media fiends before this (Jennifer Aniston's nose job?). And those "fiends" aren't dumb. We eat that stuff up. There's nothing like a good celebrity rag to pass the time while we're clocked-in at the cubicle. I think Britney knew (at least in part) what she was doing. She's mastered the art of stirring things up (and she's been doing it for years!).
Oops! ...I did it again
I played with your heart,
got lost in the game
Oops! ...You think I'm in love,
That I'm sent from above
I'm not that innocent
It seems that none of us are innocent when it comes to these sorts of things. I know that by writing about Britney's "meltdown" here I'm only extending her exposure (but minutely, at best). But I also feel like there is a big difference between poking fun at a celebrity's silly Golden Globe gown and contributing to the general lack of understanding, which I believe still exists, about mental illness and physical addiction. ("Spears has gone nuts! She's gone insane, I tell ya!")
And if her reasons for checking herself into a rehabilitation center are legitimate, then seeking treatment is honorable. I hope very much that she takes it seriously and sticks it out so that she might earn some good publicity. I also hope that the general public doesn't relish hearing about the suffering of others (and I mean actual suffering, not embarrassment from some wardrobe malfunction). I think that is something we, as the media-consuming public, should be careful about. Laughter is healthy, but sadism is decidedly toxic.
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